Last week we hosted long-time friends who were passing through on their way to a university reunion. These are active United Church laypeople and she is the sort of engaged, thoughtful Christian whose leadership skills would be an asset in any congregation. I have always found her positive and ready to face the challenges and changes of church life.
During our evening chat we realized how hurt and even angry she is about the recent departure of their minister. The minister announced her departure without warning after only a few years with them. She was admired by the flock and was offering innovative and meaningful worship leadership. So why would she leave, and not give the congregation a chance to negotiate through concerns? No one including the Board chair and Ministry and Personnel committee were aware of what was unfolding. I could tell our friend took this personally, as a form of betrayal in a way, and I can understand why. That is often the feeling, even after long pastorates.
At the same time I know the situation in the congregation well, and it is a demanding place to be. It is just a complicated ministry which requires constant vigilance and problem-solving. The minister probably felt that it was easier to leave and start again. It certainly wasn't for greener pastures, and the folk she left are really good people. But in these complicated times it can be difficult to see a way forward for clergy.
As I listened I figured everyone had lost something. I am sure Christ is still present in the congregation, but their loss of leadership is significant. The minister is a person of abiding faith who will take her gifts elsewhere. But there are many casualties in these unsettled times for the church, and it all seems rather unfair. I'm sure that most people have little idea how bewildered many clergy feel as they attempt to preach and live the Good News in times which seem to be really bad news.
Have you gone through a similar experience of loss? It is wrong to be hurt by a minister's departure or is it just one of the realities of grief?
4 comments:
I have been saddened , but never "hurt"...
Congregations go through "life cycle" episodes of various kinds. Clergy and lay leadership, and ministry programs of all types. Time lines for each of these can vary.
However, knowing all of this does not diminish the ensuing sadness and anxiety for the future. Congregations do need some kind of support mechanism to process these challenging times and to proceed constructively.
I would hit a "like" button for Frank's comment....
You're right Judy. A wise response.
Post a Comment