Dear Revinne, (Reverend)
My mommy and daddy had there weding here
This was the note passed to me by a solemn-faced seven or eight-year--old on Sunday morning.
She and her mother were visiting grandparents from out of town for Mother's Day and they came to church. The same sweet girl sought me out when here at Christmas and informed me that her Dad didn't live with them anymore because her parents are divorced. I'm a softie when it comes to kids and that misspelled note touched my heart. I have no idea whether she attends church when at home, but she has chosen to trust me with what is at the forefront of her heart and mind.
I am writing this, not as a comment on divorce and its effects on children, but as a reminder that children are spiritual beings. Kids may not be as articulate as adults but they want to express their faith and the everyday realities that affect them. Child psychiatrist Robert Coles wrote a book called The Spiritual Life of Children after working with kids for thirty years. Through those years he discovered how rich their faith can be and the importance of listening.
So often we regard children in terms of numbers -- every congregation covets kids and at times it feels as though we are speaking of a commodity rather than individual people. My conversation with the child on Sunday made me think about the circumstances, including loss of loved ones, that have a profound impact on children. When we hear of deaths in families, or of marital separations we can make a point of supporting the children affected as well as the adults. And we can listen.
3 comments:
While volunteering with young children I have always been touched when a child tells me what's on their mind. It happens most often while doing some other activity and often I think the children themselves are surprised by their sudden annoucement. I always feel that some of the burden has been "let out" for them in those moments.
I recently chatted with a little girl who had a family member in hospital for a fairly routine (although never worry free) bit of surgery. The first words from her mouth when she saw me were to tell me that her family had received a prayer shawl from our church. Her comments spoke to me of the love that our church-going kids feel, even as you say David, if they can't always quite articulate that comfort they experience.Although chilldhood is supposed to be carefree, most often it is not, and often as I've watched kids struggle in school and home environments, I have wished that somehow they could know the love found in regular church life to support them through those everyday realities. I couldn't help but think of your final remark on listening....not always fixing or advising or preaching because we are older and more experienced but simply listening.
Yes, the spontaneity of children, and their matter-of-fact spirituality regularly delights me and takes me off guard. Thanks to both of you.
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