The parents/grandparents arrive with the children for the nursery school every day and our administrator Helen buzzes them in through our secure door. One cheerful little guy yells out a hearty "thank you!" every single time. One day I dashed out to put a face to a voice and to compliment him on being so polite.
Well, yesterday he wasn't so cheerful. He was wailing away as he came through the door and I could hear his mother admonishing him for being so difficult. Then I heard a mournful "thank you!" despite the fact that he was in such a miserable mood. Now that's training.
We laughed at the contrast between his words and his demeanour, but that is life isn't it? There are times when we don't feel the slightest bit grateful, yet we still try to express it because we want to live toward thankfulness. The life of faith invites us to say "thank you!" even in the tough times and encourages us to believe that it is a gift from God.
I'm often struck by the lack of civility and gratitude around us. This boy modelled gratitude for our staff, even in his grumpiness.
Do you think we live in a grateful society? How easy is it for you to say thank you?
It is easy for me to say thank you. There are sooo many things to be grateful for. However, I find it is the young who do not say thank you enough. They need to be constantly reminded and then it seems only superficial. Many feel it is their right to have and do things, not a privilege. Perhaps it comes with age, when one truly realizes the gifts they have and how fortunate they are. I will however continue to instill in the young people I deal with daily, that one needs to show gratitude through the use of the word, thank you.
ReplyDeleteOkay, here it goes. No sleep last night. Teenagers in the house. That's the short story. Still, even in my disappointment and anger I felt thankful that they were both home safe [eventually] and today as most days neither of them feel particularly grateful or have even an inkling of how lucky they are. The young do seem less able to focus on gratitude. I know it will come, but I can't help but wish it would come faster. I do remember thinking myself the most unlucky person in the world at their age, and I was very unlucky in many respects. Eventually though maturity takes hold and so for now I keep faith in the evolution of teens to adults. God must know what He is doing. The process must be in some way essential because it seems universal. I would have never thought I would have one day felt thankful for even the bad days. It takes a journey for that to make sense and I can see that my teens have really just put on their shoes at this point. The journey is yet to come.
ReplyDeleteOh, this is one I've gotta comment on. There is little that annoys me more than people who can't be thankful towards others. I don't know whether it is a sense of entitlement that makes people act this way, but it really bothers me. It is one of the things I constantly remind my tween daughter to do...and she does a pretty good job overall.
ReplyDeleteIt is so important to me that if I were dating someone who wasn't polite to third parties, I knew there would be no future between us.
Author Anne Lamott's prayer "thank you, thank you, thank you and help me, help me, help me"always finishes my personal prayers, as I couldn't possibly list all the things for which I am thankful, or for that matter, all the faithful living things I need help with. We live in abundance in Canada, (although varying levels of abundance)gratitude one would think, would come more easily to us (except perhaps during those "entitled tween/teen years...if I only knew then what I know now...)
ReplyDeleteIn Sunday school last month we were learning about Joseph's jealous brothers. We talked about jelaousy in our own lives.We talked about gratitude as a way to combat jealousy. I would think an attitude of gratitude could heal/correct many of our human foibles.
After volunteering all week at a school book fair, a written thank you from one of the school's librarian made me forget the irritants of the fair. And yes, I got many strange looks from the children and youth when I thanked them for shopping at the book fair. Sometimes, I think it can become an unconsious act to say thank you without being aware of what we are saying. Yet, a written thank you whether by hand, or email shows conscious intentionality and thought. A number of years ago, there was an author who fostered the idea of the gratitude journal - the daily writing of thanking a 'higher source' (for me - God)for 5 things that we normally take for granted but that we were indeed blessed with (for a cup of coffee, a kiss/hug from a child, a compliment from a partner/friend, a flower noticed on the way to work, etc). Somehow the actual physical writing of thanking God and naming my blessings has made a difference. And today, showed me what a difference a written note can do, too.
ReplyDeleteI suppose I should start by expressing thanks for your responses. All add to the discussion. Important reminders that gratitude is learned and cultivated and shouldn't be taken for granted.
ReplyDeleteLaura mentions the story of Joseph, which the Sunday School is working on this year. It is one of the most powerful stories of forgiveness in the bible and gratitude is part of it. That fits with Margaret Visser's contention in The Gift of Thanks that there is something about thankfulness that is a transaction of grace, of giving and receiving, that has strong spiritual resonance.
Good to hear from you Susan.
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