Wednesday, December 30, 2009

Wedded Ballistics


Yesterday I listened to an interview with the Rev. Brent Hawkes who has been the pastor at the Metropolitan Community Church in Toronto for decades. Some describe it as "the gay church" although while the majority of members are gay, it is an eclectic congregation.

Hawkes was asked to reflect back eight years to two marriages he performed, one for a male couple and the other for a female couple. Before the laws of the province changed to permit same-gender marriage, he published the banns for both couples. The language of the banns assumed that a couple was made up of two persons of the opposite gender, but it only stated that it was two persons. So, he went ahead with the marriages and later the law changed.

He shared that in the days leading up to the ceremonies the church was in the eye of a media hurricane. He received hate mail which included death threats. Unfortunately some of it came from Christians opposed to homosexuality and to same-gender marriage. He conducted the weddings wearing a bullet-proof vest and with a heavy police presence.

I know that readers have a range of opinions on same-gender marriage, which is not surprising in a diverse society where freedom of expression and religious conviction is encouraged.

Where are you in all this? Has your attitude changed with time (most of us were raised with particular views about homosexuality)? Do you continue with the convictions developed in earlier years? I ask this, not in judgement of anyone, but with real curiosity.

4 comments:

  1. I come from an angle of inclusion rather than exclusion. I think if two people want to get married, then they should be able to get married.

    Another way I look at it is...how does gay marriage affect me? It really doesn't, and I think it is unfortunate that there are people out there who are so feverishly against it that they would harm, or threaten to harm, others(like Rev. Hawkes).

    I think - and hope - that the fact that there have been many gay marriages has made people more accepting of homosexual relationships. I'm not saying it has made people accept their lifestyle, but perhaps it has made them realize that relationships are relationships, regardless of sexuality.

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  2. Well said johnny! Relationships are relationships, regardless of sexuality! These relationships can take many forms, couples, families, friends etc. I have gay friends who are married and have recently adopted 4, yes that's FOUR children - siblings. (they range in age from 7 months to 6 years). When I look at that family I think, wow, those children are very fortunate to have two great dads who have taken on so much, and who love their children unconditionally.

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  3. I will second Nancy, with "well said Johnny"

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  4. I have come to realize that there are certain issues on which there will never be total agreement. But like Johnny I wonder how people can be so convinced that they have a pipeline to the love of God that it gives them permission to hate others. And I can't really think of another situation where we could consider it a sin that two people want to commit themselves to one another.

    As for adoption, a very different issue, I had a conversation with someone who works for the Childrens' Aid Society in which he mentioned that their experience with adoption by gay couples has been very positive. Remember that it wasn't all that long ago that a single person wasn't allowed to adopt.

    Thanks to all three of you.

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