The Way of Forgiveness

Two days ago I heard that the 2011 murder conviction of Mark Edward Grant had been overturned, the result of a retrial. Candace Derksen was only thirteen when she was murdered in 1984 and doing the math points out that it was more than 25 years after her death that Grant was sent to prison.

Justice Karen Simonsen told a packed courtroom in Winnipeg on Wednesday afternoon that "the totality of the evidence before me ... falls short of the standard of proof beyond a reasonable doubt."



The Derksens

This news caught my attention because Candace's mother, Wilma Derksen, has written several books two of them thoughtful, powerful explorations of the subject of forgiveness. The earlier book was called Unsettled Weather: How Do I Forgive? The other, released this year is The Way of Letting God: One Woman's Walk Toward Forgiveness.

By coincidence, or serendipity, or providence I tuned in to an interview with Derksen on CBC radio's The Current yesterday, less than 24 hours after the verdict. As I listened I was struck by the grace and dignity and wisdom Wilma expressed despite how raw her emotions must be. She agreed that the judge had made the correct ruling because of the errors made in the earlier trail. She expressed her hope that Mark Grant would make the best of the second chance for life he has been given, even though she may feel he is guilty.

Anna Maria Tremonti did an excellent job of interviewing Derksen, asking whether she had been able to forgive. Derksen's response is that she is a process person, so she will continue to work through the complex realities of forgiveness, including forgiving herself for not being there at the right moment for Candace. While that might not be a reasonable expectation of herself, guilt is rarely rationale, and neither is hate.

Tremonti also asked about the importance of faith in this process. I am aware that Derksen is a Christian but as she answered she was generous in saying that while her faith is in God for others it may be a Higher Power or some other way of describing faith. She also spoke of the importance of friends and family through what can be a lonely journey of letting go.



Candace Derksen

I spent years in ministry listening to the anger of parishioners wrestling with the "unforgivable." I have my own issues with letting go and forgiving which will likely continue for a lifetime. I found her witness inspiring.

I recommend listening to the interview, and the link is below. Did you hear it? Are you intrigued because of your own issues with forgiveness? Does faith make a difference for you in forgiving others or yourself?

http://www.cbc.ca/radio/thecurrent/the-current-for-october-19-2017-1.4360698/we-can-live-with-it-candace-derksen-murder-retrial-ends-in-not-guilty-verdict-1.4360700