Remembering the Fallen, 30 Years On

Thirty years ago a hateful young man opened fire in the Ecole Polytechnique in Montreal killing 14 bright, motivated young women. Their crime, in his deranged view, was that they were women who were somehow making his life more difficult because they were pursuing careers and accomplishing goals. 

While we may think this was a tragic event from the past we might keep in mind that only a year ago another young man drove a van along a crowded Toronto sidewalk, killing ten. Eight of the victims were women, and we discovered in the aftermath that the perpetrator was seeking a perverted revenge for his perceived  rejection by women. 

Every day women die in this country at the hands of men, often blamed by their killers for their failures. It is hideous, but the evidence of this sort of misogyny is clear and simply doesn't end. 

A couple of days after the Montreal Massacre in 1989 I took part in a memorial in a Sudbury United Church which was organized by a female colleague. At that time our two daughters were four and two years old and I wondered about their future. I am grateful that neither has been in an abusive relationship through the years, but they are well aware of the threat to women, even in this relatively enlightened society. Of course Ruth, my wife, worked as a crisis counsellor in a shelter for women and children leaving abusive relationships for a decade.I'll admit that at times I was enraged by the stories of cowardly attacks by male partners which forced them to flee.  

As a husband and parent of daughters I want the world to change. I don't want a misogynist president in the United States to be able to live without consequence for his actions. I don't want to wake up to news of another woman or children murdered in their suburban home. I don't want excuses for the sale of assault weapons which wreak havoc on the innocent because of some bizarre notions about manliness. 

Let's remember those 14 young women who died 30 years ago, realizing that they were robbed of the fullness of life. Some of them would be at the height of their careers, perhaps parents of daughters themselves. 

Please say a prayer today for the women who live in fear and shame from day to day and feel they have no options. Pray for the men who are considering violence against the vulnerable, that they may be healed of their anger. Pray that religious leaders, including clergy, will be part of the solution rather than perpetuators of the problem. God, we want our society to find a different path.