Thursday, June 18, 2020

Virtual Ashes, Virtual Dust, Plenty of Love & Resurrection Hope

The lonely reality of Zoom funerals | MIT Technology Review

Some of the weariness of these strange pandemic days comes from trying to keep up with the ever-changing recommendations and regulations. A week ago I wrote about worship communities being given the green light to come together again at 30 percent capacity -- except that many denominations and religious groups discouraged doing so.In that same blog I mentioned that this didn't apply to weddings and funerals but a day later it did. Little wonder that clergy are exhausted as they try to navigate it all, often with divergent opinions within their congregations. 

Last Saturday we attended a funeral -- a memorial service, actually -- and we weren't physically present. It was in Colorado and the rules there only allow for five people to be present, as well as the presider. The service was live-streamed and we found out afterward that 75 people joined this cluster of family members, including the widow. 

I married this couple 18 years ago, two people who had lost their spouses to miserable illnesses and met in the most improbable way. After her husband's death in their home province of Nova Scotia she began renting their summer seaside  home to pay the mortgage. He lived in St. Louis and decided to visit this ocean province with members of his family. They hit it off and he began to commute to Nova Scotia for courtship -- how is that for romantic commitment?

 He was a devout Christian and sought out a church in Halifax which turned out to be the one I served. She wasn't religious but came along one Sunday and something stirred within her which led to a spiritual awakening as a Christian which has sustained her through many challenges, including her husband's lengthy decline due to Alzheimer's. 

Ashes to Ashes, Dust to Zoom: Inside My Grandmother̢۪s Virtual ...

We certainly admired them both, and while our friendship was in its early stages before they moved to the States we have stayed in touch through the years and visited together. We wanted to be congregants at this service and so we zoomed in. It was meaningful because he was so deeply respected and loved by many, and deservedly so. Everyone who gave tributes spoke well, and with obvious affection. Those who watched the service were everywhere from Alaska to Nova Scotia, Michigan to Florida. Members of their Colorado congregation were there, virtually, as well. 

Some families are choosing to defer funeral/memorial services or gatherings until a later date, and for obvious reasons. And perhaps the new regulations in Ontario will mean that families and friends are able to come together immediately rather than at a later date. The service we participated last Saturday was a reminder that we can still be the "Body of Christ," even when we feel rather disembodied. Love, respect, and resurrection hope are not confined to one place or time. 

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