When I was in congregational ministry I increasingly had misgivings about presiding at wedding ceremonies. As our culture became more secular and spectacle oriented I didn't want to be the "insert clergy here" person. Many of us in ministry were relieved when governments licensed officiants to conduct weddings and almost immediately couples chose this option rather than church and clergy ceremonies. Still, there was a sense of promise and joy to most wedding services as couples made promises of love and fidelity. I was steadfast in not removing the God aspect in these celebrations.
I was touched as I read a recent Globe and Mail article about weddings in Gaza, the war-ravaged enclave for Palestinians. Despite the horror of destruction and death couples continue to make declarations of love. Nearly everything about the traditional services has changed yet thesecouples continue to pledge themselves to one another, sometimes in mass weddings, or in tents, or in settings amidst the rubble. At one courthouse there are up to 20 weddings a day. Here is a description of one ceremony and celebration from the Globe article:
The wedding was simple, modest and full of emotion. The bride wore a white dress embroidered with traditional Palestinian patterns. She stood in the crowded hall of her house, surrounded by family and friends, as the space filled with clapping and classical songs few hear any more in Gaza.
There was no electricity, as usual, but the room was lit with small battery-powered lights. There were no big speakers or fancy cameras, just a cellphone recording videos, and people trying to enjoy a special moment.
Children danced between chairs and women let out zaghareet, the traditional high-pitched ululation used in celebrations. The sound of music rose above the sound of planes and everyone danced and sang despite the noise from Israeli tanks near our refugee camp. There was no food on offer because there is hardly any to be found in Gaza.
Weddings may be simpler now than they were before the war, but they are a symbol that life goes on.
There are times when planned weddings don't come to fruition because a bride or groom or family members are killed in the conflict. It is a sombre reality in what has become a living hell and yet people are determined to find joy amidst the sorrow.
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