The Incredulity of St. Thomas -- Caravaggio
But Thomas (who was called the Twin, one of the twelve, was not with them when Jesus came. So the other disciples told him, “We have seen the Lord.” But he said to them, “Unless I see the mark of the nails in his hands, and put my finger in the mark of the nails and my hand in his side, I will not believe.”
John 20: 24-25 NRSV
Last week I chatted with a guy I met a few years back who at the time was curious about God. He wasn't a churchgoer but he'd had a profound spiritual experience after a bleak medical diagnosis and his simple faith, which included prayer, had been a source of comfort long after an unexpected recovery.
When we got together recently it wasn't for the purpose of a spiritual check-in but during conversation he admitted to me that he'd been struggling with his relationship with God. It was related to what was happening in Ukraine and the suffering of innocent people, including children. I suggested to him that it is reasonable for any of us to wonder about a God of love and justice when we witness suffering or experience it ourselves. We had a broader discussion about doubt, which it turned out he found reassuring.
This is "Doubt Sunday" in a way, with the passage from John's gospel in which Thomas expressed his reservations about what might have seemed to be a grief-striken claim by Mary about Jesus coming back to life. Most years when this story came around I spoke about our doubts and uncertainties, usually with a fair amount of response from those gathered. Even when we have a strong resurrection hope life's circumstances, whether on the world stage or our personal lives, can shake us to the core.
There are plenty of wise people who've suggested that the opposite of faith isn't doubt -- doubt can be the most reasonable response to unfairness and tragedy -- it is the kind of certainty which doesn't allow for the honest questions which swirl through our hearts and minds when life doesn't make sense, as is so often the case.
This morning I saw a video of Ukrainian Christians outside their church after the air raid sirens had ended. The priest went along a row of people who had brought their wicker Easter baskets to be blessed. It was touching to see these folk doing their best to affirm their hope in spite of circumstances which would shake anyone's faith to the foundations.
It's important to realize that the gospel writer included the story of Thomas in the same chapter as the discovery of the empty tomb. Instead of Doubting Thomas we should call him Honest Thomas, which all of us can aspire to, God being our helper.
A week later his disciples were again in the house, and Thomas was with them. Although the doors were shut, Jesus came and stood among them and said, “Peace be with you.” Then he said to Thomas, “Put your finger here and see my hands. Reach out your hand and put it in my side. Do not doubt but believe.” Thomas answered him, “My Lord and my God!” Jesus said to him, “Have you believed because you have seen me? Blessed are those who have not seen and yet have come to believe.”
John 20: 26-29 NRSV
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