Wednesday, May 01, 2019

Women and the History of Shelter in Canada



Image result for women's shelters


Yesterday I saw a tweet by Margot Goodhand expressing excitement that today Maryam Monsef, Minister of International Development and Minister for Women and Gender Equality, will honour the founders of the first shelter for women leaving abusive relationships in Canada, which opened in 1973. Do the math and you'll realize that this is four years shy of the 50th anniversary. These women pioneers were met with disdain, ignorance, and little in the way of financial support. One of them, Ardis Beaudry is now 90 years old, and will be present. I was intrigued, so searched for more information online and found...none. Apparently this is not particularly newsworthy especially when we can hear about the premier of the province of Ontario showing up on Fox News in the States. 

For a decade, Ruth, my wife, used her counselling training in the context of a shelter for women and children, first as a child and youth worker, then as an outreach counselor. She often helped women develop plans for safely leaving abusive relationships and she regularly accompanied women to court. She was resourceful, kind, brave, and at times I wondered about her safety.

The congregation I served through those years was very supportive of the work Ruth did and the needs of the shelter, which were many. While there is government funding for shelters, it is never enough to address everything required, especially since they often leave with little more than the clothes they are wearing.

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This morning we discussed the disappoint Ruth experienced when she offered to visit congregations to speak about her work and how to respond to abuse. The roadblock was often the male pastors and priests who either naively felt that it wasn't an issue in their congregations or whose commitment was keeping marriages intact despite a history of verbal and physical abuse. It infuriated me. 

When Ruth did have the opportunity to speak in churches she was invariably approached by people who wanted to talk about their personal experiences of abuse, or that of family members. In our middle class and positive faith family at least ten women became her clients through the years, usually without anyone else in the congregation aware of what they were addressing. 

Thank God for the shelters which exist across the country, those who founded them, and those who provide what is an essential service. We need to pray for those living in the isolation and fear of abuse and that if they are part of faith communities they will be supported with love and understanding.

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